So I finally broke down and I am going to write the story of the ManCamping May 2-4 long weekend trip. As I tried to tell you before, SOMEONE was supposed to write it, but they didn’t and our manly stubbornness is getting in the way of your enjoyment. So here is a little lunch time short story for you about our trip to Cox Lake. Yup… you read that right. ManCamping went to Cox Lake.
The idea was to get away for the first long weekend of the summer and get paddling. Pretty simple right? Not so much for all of us. Johnny, actually had to send his wife off to Iceland for the weekend, AND THEN find someone to watch the non-campable dog before he was “allowed” to go. Sorry Johnny, it needed to be written. After completing this task, we still needed to get Brad out of work early on the Friday. This did not end so successfully. Johnny and I, took off mid-afternoon to make sure that we arrived in Peterborough before Wild Rock Outfitters closed. Yes the other two lads (Brad and Bender aka Caillou) that were with us, needed to rent a boat and weren’t going to make it on time.
Guess what Johnny and I did to kill three hours till they showed up? We went for a pint and some wings!
We don’t promote drinking and boating, but one beer over a 3 or 4 hour period is not going to make a difference. We spent most of those three hours convincing Brad via Facebook, that he should “Shit his pants” to get himself out of work early. No one wants you around if you have shit your pants. He would be allowed to leave and we would have been on our way. But no, Brad wouldn’t concede to shitting his pants. We even have a rule in our circle of friends, it’s called the “Cashing Your Ticket” rule. Once a year you get a ticket…. to, of course, shit your pants. Free of ridicule (Sort of). But you only get one… so I guess we can’t blame Brad for not wanting to cash his in in May. What happens if there is an accident in the last 7 months of the year? The best time to cash said ticket is actually during the New Year’s countdown. You’ll have a new ticket in 10 seconds or less. We’re getting off topic here.
Brad and Bender finally showed up, and off we went. By the time we got moving, hit a store for smokes and drove to the launch point.. It was dark. Shocker. This is the exact same crew of guys that did the Pirate Island trip last year, launching at 11:30 at night. So as you can guess… we launched. This time it wasn’t so bad, we could still paddle by ambient light for about a half hour. Which is really all we needed to get to our first night site on Long Lake. Just past the first portage.
I should also mention that Brad decided he would throw out a challenge to me on Instagram before we left, that he and Bender would out paddle me and Johnny as they were younger and wouldn’t tire as easily. I suggested that our experience would overtake them. We were both right. Brad and Bender covered enough water to lap the entire lake 4 times over. Johnny and I just kind of watched them go back and forth behind our boat the entire first day. Picture a drunken Shriner trying to drive a little clown car drunk. That’s the best way I can describe it. Technically they would have won this race, if they could figure out how to steer the damn ship.
We barely setup camp before the drinks came out and Johnny became a shit disturber. On the ride to Peterborough, Johnny told me all about his plan to start arguments about politics, unions, etc. with a ten word aggravating sentence. It worked. Specifically because Brad and I don’t see eye to eye on anything. But it all works out because we love to argue and because Brad can’t possibly keep up an argument against my brilliant mind. (See what happens when I write the story?J). We all have a little more to drink than we thought, fall into our respective tents and get some shut eye.
I’m breaking this up into a few different posts… It turns out, it is longer than a short story. When idiots get together. There is a lot tell you about.